Exploring Women’s Lived Experiences of Emotional Neglect in Modern Marital Relationships

Abstract

The present study aimed to explore women’s lived experiences of emotional neglect in modern marital relationships and to explain its psychological, relational, and identity-related consequences. This qualitative study was conducted using a phenomenological design. The participants included 18 married women living in Tehran who reported repeated experiences of emotional neglect in their marital relationships. Participants were selected through purposive sampling with maximum variation in age, marriage duration, employment status, and educational level. Data collection continued until theoretical saturation was achieved. Data were gathered through in-depth semi-structured interviews. Each interview lasted between 45 and 75 minutes and, after informed consent was obtained, was audio-recorded and transcribed verbatim. Data were analyzed using Braun and Clarke’s six-phase thematic analysis approach with the assistance of NVivo software. To enhance trustworthiness, member checking, peer review, analytic memo writing, partial recoding of the data, and documentation of the research decision trail were applied. Data analysis led to the identification of five main categories: the silence of emotional responsiveness in everyday life, loneliness in the presence of the spouse, invalidation of emotional needs, gradual erosion of intimacy, and redefinition of the feminine self within the relationship. The findings indicated that emotional neglect was not necessarily experienced as overt aggression or explicit marital violence; rather, it appeared through silence, indifference, lack of attention to inner emotional states, absence of support during distress, short and mechanical responses, and the reduction of emotional conversation to daily responsibilities. Participants described this experience as “emotional absence despite physical presence,” which gradually produced feelings of worthlessness, shame about emotional needs, self-censorship, reduced willingness to communicate, and emotional distancing from the spouse. The findings suggest that emotional neglect in modern marriages may operate as a silent but erosive relational process that undermines intimacy, emotional security, and women’s relational identity. Couple therapy interventions should move beyond overt conflicts and address hidden patterns of unmet emotional needs, lack of empathy, and reduced emotional accessibility.