Exploring the Lived Experience of Couples with Large Age Gaps in Redefining Power Roles

Abstract

This study aimed to explore the lived experience of couples with large age gaps regarding the redefinition of power roles within marital relationships. This qualitative study was conducted using a descriptive phenomenological approach. The participants were 24 individuals, comprising 12 married couples with an age gap of at least 10 years, living in Tehran, Iran. They were selected through purposive sampling based on predefined inclusion criteria. Data were collected through in-depth semi-structured interviews and continued until theoretical saturation was achieved. Initial saturation occurred after the twentieth interview, and four additional interviews were conducted to ensure conceptual adequacy. Interviews lasted between 45 and 80 minutes. All interviews were audio-recorded with informed consent, transcribed verbatim, and analyzed using NVivo software. Data analysis followed thematic analysis procedures, including familiarization with the transcripts, initial coding, development of subthemes, and organization of main categories. Credibility and trustworthiness were enhanced through member checking, prolonged engagement with the data, peer review, and maintaining an analytic audit trail. The analysis yielded four main categories: “power based on age and lived experience,” “negotiation over family decision-making,” “boundary-setting against familial and social judgment,” and “transition from hidden dominance to negotiated partnership.” The findings indicated that large age gaps were initially interpreted as symbolic capital, greater life experience, economic authority, or decision-making legitimacy. Over time, however, couples were compelled to redefine these patterns through dialogue, negotiation, boundary-setting, and redistribution of relational authority. The lived experience of couples with large age gaps suggests that age difference alone does not determine marital quality. Rather, the meanings attributed to age, power, experience, gender, economic resources, and family expectations shape the relational trajectory. Redefining power roles may support marital adjustment when couples move beyond hierarchical and one-sided caregiving patterns toward mutual influence, shared responsibility, and egalitarian dialogue.